How to play Broom with your dog.

First, it helps to have a high-strung dog. It's not absolutely necessary, but it really makes for a funner time for all. You know, like going to a haunted house with someone who screams a lot? It's just better.

So, the next time your dog is bugging you to death, catch her eye and slowly walk to the closet where you keep your broom (you must have a broom to play this game, as playing _____ with your dog is not as much fun. A small table or stool can be substituted [as if you were a lion trainer], but, really, I recommend the broom. The first time or 2, she might not really get it, but she'll come around.

Like with little kids, it also helps to pretend to be a monster or some other scary thing. You know in horror movies how it's scarier when the creepy thing moves slowly or unnaturally? Like that.

At this point, your dog will either will have gone to sleep, will be interested in what you're doing, or will have continued to bug whomever is still sitting down. If your dog chooses options A or C, then, I'm sorry to say, you do not have a Broomdog.

But, for those of you with Broomdogs, slowly open the door to the broom closet, get the broom out and (as long as the dog is looking) peek it around the corner. In my house, this results in either fake growling or a playbow*, then a bunch of crazy racing around the living room like someone set her on fire.

Next, start walking across the kitchen back to the living room. Now, don't forget to be all creepy-like and do make sure to tap or zhuzh the broom on the floor as you go.

Once you get over by the dog, suddenly rush towards her with the broom, as if it were going to eat her. She'll probably race around trying to "get away".

At this point you can stop acting creepy and just chase her around. I like to press the broom to her tail and see how many times Ii can get her to race around in a really small circle. Also fun: trying to smash her feet with the bristles as she runs and using the evil broom to trap her in a corner.

After 5-10 minutes of Broom, your pup will probably lie down and sleep.

And that's all were looking for, really.

*http://mypetjawa.mu.nu/archives/106089.php