Tuesday, February 28, 2006
Our FBI prints came back!
And about 6.5 weeks early at that! They were supposed to take 6-8 weeks--the agency said to beg them to do it in 4. Well, they came yesterday--9 days after we mailed them off to Clarksburg WV!
Yay! And, today is the day we get our new CW, too. :)
Yay! And, today is the day we get our new CW, too. :)
Monday, February 27, 2006
1 day until we get a new CW...
So, we had friends over this weekend, and if I had known they were going to bring their Linda Blair doll, I'd have brought mine too!!! After 24 hours of running around with the dogs, their poor kiddo got to Sunday afternoon and then her guts were like, "That's it!!! The mac-n-cheese and raisins are comin' OUT!".
How is it that kids seem to be feeling fine and then suddenly projectile vomit? (I have no idea, it's a mystery--George Carlin anyone?). That's kid's a smarty, though, when Mom asked what goes in the bucket, baby knew right away--> "barf"
Anyway, we keep running into people who have, themselves, or who know someone who has adopted from China. This morning Dave and I got an email from a work associate of Dave's in Idaho--> "Hey! Kelly [another work associate, this time from Barrington] told us you're adopting, if you want to talk to my wife, we love to. We've got a 4 year old we adopted from China".
As Dave says, they're coming out of the woodwork! Tomorrow is the day they pick a new CW for us and then we should be able to get rolling again. Tonight maybe I'll get the passport info together....
How is it that kids seem to be feeling fine and then suddenly projectile vomit? (I have no idea, it's a mystery--George Carlin anyone?). That's kid's a smarty, though, when Mom asked what goes in the bucket, baby knew right away--> "barf"
Anyway, we keep running into people who have, themselves, or who know someone who has adopted from China. This morning Dave and I got an email from a work associate of Dave's in Idaho--> "Hey! Kelly [another work associate, this time from Barrington] told us you're adopting, if you want to talk to my wife, we love to. We've got a 4 year old we adopted from China".
As Dave says, they're coming out of the woodwork! Tomorrow is the day they pick a new CW for us and then we should be able to get rolling again. Tonight maybe I'll get the passport info together....
Saturday, February 25, 2006
Four days until we get a new CW...
Our Adoption FAQ
Why not adopt from the U.S.?
Well, for a couple of reasons, not the least of which is that adoptions do fail, and not infrequently. A lot of people who have tried to adopt domestically have a failed try story, and I just don't think I could take the sadness after all the rest of what has gone on.
Sometimes the birthmother changes her mind (she's got 72 perfectly legitimate hours to do so), sometimes the birthfather was unaware of the situation and now that he is, will not sign away rights. In a lot of cases, by that time you have both your heart and a lot of money invested (adoptive families frequently pay some of the medical expenses).
Then, there's the second reason. Most adoption in the U.S. these days are so-called Open adoptions. This means that the birthparents (and sometimes the members of their extended families) continue to have contact with the baby after you adopt him/her.
This can range from pictures once a year to full on invitations-to-birthday-parties. And--it really depends on what the birthmother wants, after all, she's picking you.
I suppose this is good for the baby, and I'm not against an adopted baby knowing about his/her first family, nor would I be opposed to the picture exchange, so much, but I kind of don't want to share my kid.
I wouldn't want to share it if I had given birth to it and I don't want to share it now either. You know?
Why adopt from China in particular?
It took a lot of talking to finally settle on China. At first it was the decision between a baby that looks like us and a baby that doesn't.
Caucasian babies can be adopted from the Ukraine and Russia, generally. From what I'd read, the Ukraine is horribly corrupt, and you could be in-country (as it's called--you need to travel to pick up most internationally adopted babies) for 2 months!!! Impossible.
As for Russia, it, too, is corrupt, but not quite as badly at the time. The problem with Russia (and the Ukraine, too, really), is that the incidence of fetal alcohol syndrome (FAS) is huge in comparison to other countries.
FAS in an unrecoverable problem in a child. That child will be adversely affected--sometimes to the point of institutionalization--for the rest of their lives. And--it's often undiagnosable until the baby is toddler age. Too late for us.
Could a baby from somewhere else--even the U.S.--have FAS? Sure, but when we compared the incidence in China (<1%)>
I think I prefer Korea. They've got a very good maternity healthcare programs that all mothers participate in--even those who are unexpectedly pregnant. The medical records are complete, sometimes you get birthmother info (including souvenirs), and the babies are raised in foster homes, instead of orphanages.
The problem with Korea? They have a height-weight chart. If you don't fall on the chart, you can't adopt from there. At the time we met with Lifelink, I would have had to lose 40lbs just to qualify. It's just not going to happen. Plus, I was offended! So, I won't be a good mom and will probably die young because I'm not on your chart. Piss off, I'll adopt from somewhere who wants their orphaned babies to have permanent homes.
So--China!
So do you get any of that information above from China?
Sadly, no. Most of the babies adopted from China have been abandoned with no information about the birthparents.
Is it true you'll probably get a girl?
Yep. 95% of the babies adopted out are girls. Although, we did sign up for a girl, a boy, or twins, so who knows what's going to happen!?! We'll have 6-8 weeks notice, so it's possible they'll call and say you have twins, be in China in 6 weeks. Mad rush!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Why so many girl babies?
China is under the one child policy, and since the responsibility for caring for aged parents (China has no social security) falls on boys, most parents want their one child to be a boy. Also, culturally, there is a preference for boys.
For those parents whose hearts break because they have to give up their first-born daughter (the government and social pressures are huge), it's not uncommon for a newborn baby to be lovingly placed in a basket, sometimes with their name and date of birth, and left somewhere they will be sure to be found. In front of a fruit stand just before opening or in a busy park, just before the day starts, for example.
I've heard that sometimes the mother hides and watches to make sure someone finds the baby. It's awful.
How long until you get your baby?
Well, it's running about 14 months right now, so that would take us to Mar/Apr 2007! It's possible that things may slow down (Boooooo), but it's also possible that they may speed up too (Yayyyyyyy)! It kind of depends on Chinese holidays and changing governmental policies.
How long do you stay in China?
We will travel with a group of adoptive parents, in a trip wrangled by the agency. So, we're not flying by the seat of our pants. (Which is good, b/c my Chinese is pretty rusty). We will probably be there 10 days or so. You get your baby on Day 2 and then spend the rest of the time doing medical clearance and immigration stuff.
From what I hear, the babies are a little scared, don't really want to sleep, don't think your formula tastes good, aren't used to wearing diapers, are sometimes afraid of baths... All in all, a pretty typical first couple nights with one's new baby!
How old will (she) be?
She will likely be around a year when we get her (the day you get your baby is commonly known as Gotcha Day!). Maybe 10 months, maybe 13, but around a year.
Will she be healthy?
Probably. Chinese doctors are conservative when it comes to putting children into the "special needs" category. Even children with fixable or minor problems like a heart murmur or cleft lip are often placed as special needs.
Otherwise, she'll probably be developmentally delayed about 3 months (i.e, at 9 months, she'll probably be sitting on her own, but not near walking. ). From what I hear, though, you go from crawling at 9 months to running around the house at 15. No rest for the wicked here!
How much does it cost?
All told, including U.S. governmental fees for paperwork, homestudy fee, adoption agency fee (they're non-profit, but still have to pay their employees), Chinese governmental fees, and travel and accommodations, it's about $16000 - 18000.
A lot, yeah, and the saving isn't easy, but don't forget about that $10390 you get back from the IRS. Yay!
So that's all I can think of, but if you've got more questions, let me know!
Why not adopt from the U.S.?
Well, for a couple of reasons, not the least of which is that adoptions do fail, and not infrequently. A lot of people who have tried to adopt domestically have a failed try story, and I just don't think I could take the sadness after all the rest of what has gone on.
Sometimes the birthmother changes her mind (she's got 72 perfectly legitimate hours to do so), sometimes the birthfather was unaware of the situation and now that he is, will not sign away rights. In a lot of cases, by that time you have both your heart and a lot of money invested (adoptive families frequently pay some of the medical expenses).
Then, there's the second reason. Most adoption in the U.S. these days are so-called Open adoptions. This means that the birthparents (and sometimes the members of their extended families) continue to have contact with the baby after you adopt him/her.
This can range from pictures once a year to full on invitations-to-birthday-parties. And--it really depends on what the birthmother wants, after all, she's picking you.
I suppose this is good for the baby, and I'm not against an adopted baby knowing about his/her first family, nor would I be opposed to the picture exchange, so much, but I kind of don't want to share my kid.
I wouldn't want to share it if I had given birth to it and I don't want to share it now either. You know?
Why adopt from China in particular?
It took a lot of talking to finally settle on China. At first it was the decision between a baby that looks like us and a baby that doesn't.
Caucasian babies can be adopted from the Ukraine and Russia, generally. From what I'd read, the Ukraine is horribly corrupt, and you could be in-country (as it's called--you need to travel to pick up most internationally adopted babies) for 2 months!!! Impossible.
As for Russia, it, too, is corrupt, but not quite as badly at the time. The problem with Russia (and the Ukraine, too, really), is that the incidence of fetal alcohol syndrome (FAS) is huge in comparison to other countries.
FAS in an unrecoverable problem in a child. That child will be adversely affected--sometimes to the point of institutionalization--for the rest of their lives. And--it's often undiagnosable until the baby is toddler age. Too late for us.
Could a baby from somewhere else--even the U.S.--have FAS? Sure, but when we compared the incidence in China (<1%)>
I think I prefer Korea. They've got a very good maternity healthcare programs that all mothers participate in--even those who are unexpectedly pregnant. The medical records are complete, sometimes you get birthmother info (including souvenirs), and the babies are raised in foster homes, instead of orphanages.
The problem with Korea? They have a height-weight chart. If you don't fall on the chart, you can't adopt from there. At the time we met with Lifelink, I would have had to lose 40lbs just to qualify. It's just not going to happen. Plus, I was offended! So, I won't be a good mom and will probably die young because I'm not on your chart. Piss off, I'll adopt from somewhere who wants their orphaned babies to have permanent homes.
So--China!
So do you get any of that information above from China?
Sadly, no. Most of the babies adopted from China have been abandoned with no information about the birthparents.
Is it true you'll probably get a girl?
Yep. 95% of the babies adopted out are girls. Although, we did sign up for a girl, a boy, or twins, so who knows what's going to happen!?! We'll have 6-8 weeks notice, so it's possible they'll call and say you have twins, be in China in 6 weeks. Mad rush!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Why so many girl babies?
China is under the one child policy, and since the responsibility for caring for aged parents (China has no social security) falls on boys, most parents want their one child to be a boy. Also, culturally, there is a preference for boys.
For those parents whose hearts break because they have to give up their first-born daughter (the government and social pressures are huge), it's not uncommon for a newborn baby to be lovingly placed in a basket, sometimes with their name and date of birth, and left somewhere they will be sure to be found. In front of a fruit stand just before opening or in a busy park, just before the day starts, for example.
I've heard that sometimes the mother hides and watches to make sure someone finds the baby. It's awful.
How long until you get your baby?
Well, it's running about 14 months right now, so that would take us to Mar/Apr 2007! It's possible that things may slow down (Boooooo), but it's also possible that they may speed up too (Yayyyyyyy)! It kind of depends on Chinese holidays and changing governmental policies.
How long do you stay in China?
We will travel with a group of adoptive parents, in a trip wrangled by the agency. So, we're not flying by the seat of our pants. (Which is good, b/c my Chinese is pretty rusty). We will probably be there 10 days or so. You get your baby on Day 2 and then spend the rest of the time doing medical clearance and immigration stuff.
From what I hear, the babies are a little scared, don't really want to sleep, don't think your formula tastes good, aren't used to wearing diapers, are sometimes afraid of baths... All in all, a pretty typical first couple nights with one's new baby!
How old will (she) be?
She will likely be around a year when we get her (the day you get your baby is commonly known as Gotcha Day!). Maybe 10 months, maybe 13, but around a year.
Will she be healthy?
Probably. Chinese doctors are conservative when it comes to putting children into the "special needs" category. Even children with fixable or minor problems like a heart murmur or cleft lip are often placed as special needs.
Otherwise, she'll probably be developmentally delayed about 3 months (i.e, at 9 months, she'll probably be sitting on her own, but not near walking. ). From what I hear, though, you go from crawling at 9 months to running around the house at 15. No rest for the wicked here!
How much does it cost?
All told, including U.S. governmental fees for paperwork, homestudy fee, adoption agency fee (they're non-profit, but still have to pay their employees), Chinese governmental fees, and travel and accommodations, it's about $16000 - 18000.
A lot, yeah, and the saving isn't easy, but don't forget about that $10390 you get back from the IRS. Yay!
So that's all I can think of, but if you've got more questions, let me know!
Friday, February 24, 2006
I neglected to mention...
...the poor pronoun possessives! (Her, his, them, it, et cetera).
Pronoun possessives don't have apostrophes. I know what you're thinking--but this is a day of apostrophes!!! But this is so important! For instance, no one at Healthcare Company Y knows how to do it.
It's even worse than things were at Healthcare Company X!!
Anyway, back to the pronouns........
If you're talking about items that belong to Susan, Larry, and their dog, this would be hers, his and its. Voila, pas d'apostrophes!
A good pneumonic device you say? An easy reference, as it were? Okay, so you don't use an apostrophe for the possessive his, right? (never seen the word hi's have you? please don't tell me if you have--I don't think my heart could take it :),
So, then, no apostrophes with hers or its either.
I hope someone from Healthcare Company Y is listening...please?...anyone?...
Pronoun possessives don't have apostrophes. I know what you're thinking--but this is a day of apostrophes!!! But this is so important! For instance, no one at Healthcare Company Y knows how to do it.
It's even worse than things were at Healthcare Company X!!
Anyway, back to the pronouns........
If you're talking about items that belong to Susan, Larry, and their dog, this would be hers, his and its. Voila, pas d'apostrophes!
A good pneumonic device you say? An easy reference, as it were? Okay, so you don't use an apostrophe for the possessive his, right? (never seen the word hi's have you? please don't tell me if you have--I don't think my heart could take it :),
So, then, no apostrophes with hers or its either.
I hope someone from Healthcare Company Y is listening...please?...anyone?...
Five days until we get a new CW…………….
In the meantime, today's post will be about apostrophes.
Lesson 1: Plurals
If you have 2 or more of anything (squirrel, hot dog, car, etc), never, under any circumstances, does this "pluralizing" require an apostrophe.
Never-never-ever. Never-ever. Only add an -s (or an -es, if needed).
Anytime you create a noun-apostrophe-"S" combo, you have created either a contraction (see below) or a possessive (see also below). "Hot Dog's 1.99" does not mean you have more than one hot dog. It means the hot dog's what?? is 1.99? (and I don't really want to know)
You can argue with me about this, but you will not be right.
Lesson 2: Contractions
Contractions are when you smash a noun (like squirrel or hot dog) and a verb (like is or am) together. Proper nouns (like Dave and Wisconsin) also count as nouns.
For instance,
"The squirrel is going to get run over" is equal to "The squirrel's going to get run over" and
"That hot dog is going to burn, now" is equal to "That hot dog's going to burn, now" as well as
"Dave is a big barbecue fan" being the same as "Dave's a big barbecue fan"
Lesson 3: Possessives
Okay, this is where the apostrophe really hits the fan.
1 squirrel has a hairbrush = squirrel's hairbrush
2 squirrels each have hairbrushes = squirrels' hairbrushes (note the addition of the -es plural (see Lesson 1)
Now for the scary part--> where the word already has an "s" on the end!
Charles has an arrest record = Charles' arrest record
or
Marbles had a margarita out on the pool deck = Marbles' margarita
There you go. Apostrophes in 3 easy lessons.
Now none of you has any excuse's.
(I mean, excuses)
Lesson 1: Plurals
If you have 2 or more of anything (squirrel, hot dog, car, etc), never, under any circumstances, does this "pluralizing" require an apostrophe.
Never-never-ever. Never-ever. Only add an -s (or an -es, if needed).
Anytime you create a noun-apostrophe-"S" combo, you have created either a contraction (see below) or a possessive (see also below). "Hot Dog's 1.99" does not mean you have more than one hot dog. It means the hot dog's what?? is 1.99? (and I don't really want to know)
You can argue with me about this, but you will not be right.
Lesson 2: Contractions
Contractions are when you smash a noun (like squirrel or hot dog) and a verb (like is or am) together. Proper nouns (like Dave and Wisconsin) also count as nouns.
For instance,
"The squirrel is going to get run over" is equal to "The squirrel's going to get run over" and
"That hot dog is going to burn, now" is equal to "That hot dog's going to burn, now" as well as
"Dave is a big barbecue fan" being the same as "Dave's a big barbecue fan"
Lesson 3: Possessives
Okay, this is where the apostrophe really hits the fan.
1 squirrel has a hairbrush = squirrel's hairbrush
2 squirrels each have hairbrushes = squirrels' hairbrushes (note the addition of the -es plural (see Lesson 1)
Now for the scary part--> where the word already has an "s" on the end!
Charles has an arrest record = Charles' arrest record
or
Marbles had a margarita out on the pool deck = Marbles' margarita
There you go. Apostrophes in 3 easy lessons.
Now none of you has any excuse's.
(I mean, excuses)
Four score and 20 caseworkers ago
I realize I’ve neglected to tell you about our caseworker at the adoption agency. Her name is (was? more on that later…) Michelle. The agency assigns one’s adoption case to a social worker who fields all your questions and conducts all the visits that are needed (one group, 2 individual, and one at our home).
As it turns out, the worker assigned to us only worked from 9-3 each day and lived in Freeport. I talked to her about this and told her that we each worked 1.5 – 2 hours from Rockford. For us to make, say, a 130 meeting, we’d have to take a whole half-day off. She did say that she thought it was odd that they assigned us to her, given the time and distance, but that we’d see how things went.
Well, no worries about that! I called yesterday to say that we’d gotten our DCFS fingerprints and were ready to make an appointment to get together, only to find out that she gave her 2 weeks notice and would no longer be our CW.
Probably for the best, given time and travel. Mind you, I’d love to work part-time and have the opportunity to inconvenience someone ELSE with MY schedule, but when you add the 1.5 – 2 hour drive? Anyway, doesn’t it just figure?
They’re meeting on Tuesday and will reassign our case to someone who, hopefully, doesn’t live in Iowa.
Y-M-C-A!
Yesterday was Fingerprinting #2. This one was for DCFS at the local YMCA. We have to become foster-certified, even thought we’re not going to be fostering. I guess it helps China to feel better about us?
Anyway, since we live in Canada, the only place nearby that does it is the Y. And only on Feb 8th and 22nd. And they don’t publish the March schedule ahead of time. And they’re only there between 9-12 and 1-430.
And Dave has a meeting today. In Warrenville. Oh, and I have class in Waukegan.
CAN’T ANYTHING EVER BE EASY!?!?!?! ARRRGHHHHH!
But, we made it on time. This time it was the ink-free scan kind—bonus!
I haven’t been inside the Y in 14 years, since swim team in high school.
I was much thinner then……
Men in Black
So, what do we do with those fingerprints? We send them off to the FBI to see if we’ve got criminal records. I suppose China would be interested in not sending a child home with a criminal….details, shmetails.
So, Sat 2/17 we
1) wrote the letter to the FBI asking them to send our not-records to us,
2) took the letter and prints to the post office,
3) got 2 $18 money orders and
4) mailed the whole shebang off to Clarksburg, W Va.
Come on, $10K tax credit! Oh, yeah, for those who don’t know, the government gives at $10390 tax credit (2006) for a completed adoption! A credit is different from a deduction in the following way: Ahem…
(Anyone who knows the answer to this question is welcome to volunteer the info. I just know credit = better.)
It was a beautiful sunny day, but cold. We took pictures in front of the P.O., even though I asked a man to take our picture and he said. No. Not I’m sorry I’m busy, not nothing. Just No. Come on—it’s McHenry, fer chrissake!
Then we went down to Mexico for the night to visit Kevin and Julie. (We had such a nice time! Thanks! Great carpet, btw, and mmmm soy milk. ;)
So, Sat 2/17 we
1) wrote the letter to the FBI asking them to send our not-records to us,
2) took the letter and prints to the post office,
3) got 2 $18 money orders and
4) mailed the whole shebang off to Clarksburg, W Va.
Come on, $10K tax credit! Oh, yeah, for those who don’t know, the government gives at $10390 tax credit (2006) for a completed adoption! A credit is different from a deduction in the following way: Ahem…
(Anyone who knows the answer to this question is welcome to volunteer the info. I just know credit = better.)
It was a beautiful sunny day, but cold. We took pictures in front of the P.O., even though I asked a man to take our picture and he said. No. Not I’m sorry I’m busy, not nothing. Just No. Come on—it’s McHenry, fer chrissake!
Then we went down to Mexico for the night to visit Kevin and Julie. (We had such a nice time! Thanks! Great carpet, btw, and mmmm soy milk. ;)
Valentine’s Day
First David came home and I went upstairs to change…he went to change in the other room…then we came downstairs into the kitchen in our sexiest workout wear, gathered up our adoption paperwork, and headed to the police station.
Not what you expected? Just par for the course in our Valentine’s history! Mind you, we always mark the day as special, but there was the time we ran into each other in the card aisle of Walgreen’s!
In fact, this might be the 1st V-Day that we didn’t make an anniversary trip to Walgreen’s.
Anyway, we got the first of our three required sets of fingerprints done this day. We were the only ones in the PD station, save the police. Boy the décor will make you not want to spend any time there.
The officer who did our prints was fairly young, as I’ve told some, I couldn’t decide whether he was somewhat cute, or strangely resembled the silver terminator in T2. The prints didn’t take long and we got to wash off the ink in the official brand-new-criminal bathroom with the recessed t.p. holder. Mmmmm, jail soap.
The officer thought it was a “good thing” we were doing and wanted to know how much it cost to adopt from China. So, I told him it was about $16-18K, with travel and all. He said, “Isn’t that like buying a kid?”. Oy.
Then we went to the gym.
Not what you expected? Just par for the course in our Valentine’s history! Mind you, we always mark the day as special, but there was the time we ran into each other in the card aisle of Walgreen’s!
In fact, this might be the 1st V-Day that we didn’t make an anniversary trip to Walgreen’s.
Anyway, we got the first of our three required sets of fingerprints done this day. We were the only ones in the PD station, save the police. Boy the décor will make you not want to spend any time there.
The officer who did our prints was fairly young, as I’ve told some, I couldn’t decide whether he was somewhat cute, or strangely resembled the silver terminator in T2. The prints didn’t take long and we got to wash off the ink in the official brand-new-criminal bathroom with the recessed t.p. holder. Mmmmm, jail soap.
The officer thought it was a “good thing” we were doing and wanted to know how much it cost to adopt from China. So, I told him it was about $16-18K, with travel and all. He said, “Isn’t that like buying a kid?”. Oy.
Then we went to the gym.
The background troika
I started work on 1/23 and we sent off the application on 1/31. On 2/1, the director of the program called me (boy those people are on the ball!). I expressed some of my anxiety about a child growing up happy, even though they know nothing of their original family.
Carma said that she has counseled many adoptive families over the years, and said that there’s going to be a time in our child’s life, as a teenager, when she tells me that she doesn’t have to do as I say because I’m not even her real mother. Carma said that I’d just have to tell her that I was the mother she got and we’d both just have to learn to live with it.
That did make me feel better. :)
On 2/3, we got the package with all the formage in it: medical forms, fingerprint forms, well water test forms, financial forms, corporal punishment forms, DCFS forms, and on and on and on!
And so the paperchase begins!
Carma said that she has counseled many adoptive families over the years, and said that there’s going to be a time in our child’s life, as a teenager, when she tells me that she doesn’t have to do as I say because I’m not even her real mother. Carma said that I’d just have to tell her that I was the mother she got and we’d both just have to learn to live with it.
That did make me feel better. :)
On 2/3, we got the package with all the formage in it: medical forms, fingerprint forms, well water test forms, financial forms, corporal punishment forms, DCFS forms, and on and on and on!
And so the paperchase begins!
More summing up
Background Part 2: In September 2005, when we found out that IVF 2 hadn’t worked, I sent off for a prelim adoption packet from Lifelink Adoption Services. My sister and brother-in-law had run into a family in Ray Wolf jewelers who had adopted am infant girl thru Lifelink and had nothing but good things to say. Their daughter was old enough to, when asked where she was born, say CHINA! Well, that was good enough for me. :)
So, the packet arrived and I did nothing with it. Seriously, nothing. Okay, I read it, but that’s it. IVF 3 in December came and went, and in January, after finding out that one didn’t work either, I did nothing again.
HAH! You thought I was going to say I called them! I didn’t! I didn’t call until April! (Inner resolution, maybe? I mean this is a baby from the other side of the world, here)
So, in late March, I decided that it was possible that if we didn’t adopt, that we might never be parents, so I called. We went to a seminar on April 6th, 2005 at the Lifelink offices in Rockford.
They’re on Spring Creek Road in the United Church of Christ building. How many churches are on Spring Creek road you might ask yourself? It’s a good thing you ask, because there are, like, ELEVEN OF THEM. Yes, for you Spinal Tap fans, the churches go up to eleven.
The problem is that while the offices are in the UCC building, what the sign out front says is NOT the UCC. It says the name of an entirely different church! First Presbyterian, maybe? I don’t know, but I do think that placing the correct name of your own church on the sign is generally a simple task.
So, we get there eventually we get there and talk with the coordinator and generally have a good meeting. We get more paperwork and head home. The next day…I do nothing!!! That’s right, I put the paperwork on the table and do nothing!!! More foot-dragging!
April……………May………………..June……………..half of July………………..
I finally got ready to send in the initial application and fee, when, on 7/13/05, I promptly got laid off. So, although Meg doesn’t believe me, I really was ready to start and got waylaid by the not-job thing.
It’s funny, though, 2 days prior to the layoff, I had said to my mom that I just didn’t know how I would ever be able to drive to Healthcare Company X every day and still have my future children eating dinner before 9pm. Apparently it was from my lips to God’s ears!
So, I wasn’t upset by the layoff, but was by the loss of the $10000 adoption benefit! Booooooooo. We decided to hold off on proceeding with the adoption stuff until I had found another job.
So—in January 2006, I started contract work with Healthcare Company Y.
My commute was cut by half! YAY!
So, the packet arrived and I did nothing with it. Seriously, nothing. Okay, I read it, but that’s it. IVF 3 in December came and went, and in January, after finding out that one didn’t work either, I did nothing again.
HAH! You thought I was going to say I called them! I didn’t! I didn’t call until April! (Inner resolution, maybe? I mean this is a baby from the other side of the world, here)
So, in late March, I decided that it was possible that if we didn’t adopt, that we might never be parents, so I called. We went to a seminar on April 6th, 2005 at the Lifelink offices in Rockford.
They’re on Spring Creek Road in the United Church of Christ building. How many churches are on Spring Creek road you might ask yourself? It’s a good thing you ask, because there are, like, ELEVEN OF THEM. Yes, for you Spinal Tap fans, the churches go up to eleven.
The problem is that while the offices are in the UCC building, what the sign out front says is NOT the UCC. It says the name of an entirely different church! First Presbyterian, maybe? I don’t know, but I do think that placing the correct name of your own church on the sign is generally a simple task.
So, we get there eventually we get there and talk with the coordinator and generally have a good meeting. We get more paperwork and head home. The next day…I do nothing!!! That’s right, I put the paperwork on the table and do nothing!!! More foot-dragging!
April……………May………………..June……………..half of July………………..
I finally got ready to send in the initial application and fee, when, on 7/13/05, I promptly got laid off. So, although Meg doesn’t believe me, I really was ready to start and got waylaid by the not-job thing.
It’s funny, though, 2 days prior to the layoff, I had said to my mom that I just didn’t know how I would ever be able to drive to Healthcare Company X every day and still have my future children eating dinner before 9pm. Apparently it was from my lips to God’s ears!
So, I wasn’t upset by the layoff, but was by the loss of the $10000 adoption benefit! Booooooooo. We decided to hold off on proceeding with the adoption stuff until I had found another job.
So—in January 2006, I started contract work with Healthcare Company Y.
My commute was cut by half! YAY!
Let me explain….no, there is too much...let me sum up.
Background Part 1:
David and I got married 10/6/2001 and it’s now been 4 years (4 years, 3 months, and 2 days, actually) since we began waiting for kids to automagically arrive. In that time, we’ve gone through a year of waiting, then a couple rounds of Clomid (a pill), 2 IUIs (injections), and 3 IVFs (you really don’t want to know;).
None of this worked (I’ve got stubborn eggs, it seems), with the exception of an early miscarriage with IVF #2. (IVF 1 was in April 04, IVF 2 in August 04, and IVF 3 in December 04).
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