The Canoe Trip of Death or How I Got Dunked in the Mighty Nip 3 Times in As Many Hours

Okay, so not really death. Maybe repeated attempted drowning...

We rented our canoes from http://www.tipacanoellc.com/, a place out of Burlington WI. They were so nice, what with their charming Wisconsin accents and all! Garrett was the guy who delivered our canoes. He had that Kenosha County accent--you know where flag and bag sound like flayg and bayg? And, man, he drove that truck/canoe rack combo like an Indy racecar. I guess you get used to parking that thing after a while, but I made sure to keep my toes out of the way!

It's really great--you pick the body of water and how long you (theoretically) want to canoe and they tell you where to show up. They bring the canoe (and canoe stuff) and then do all the shuttling around so that your car is there when you're done canoeing. Then, when you're done canoeing, you get in your car and leave. So fun and convenient.

We put in at the Keystone canoe landing in Glacial Park, for a 2 hour canoe paddle (a 2 hour canoe paddle*). We had 3 canoes, each with 2 grownups and also Baby C in her adorable life vest, which made her look much like the little brother from the Christmas Story ("I can't move my arms!"

We made sure that each non-swimmer was in a canoe with a swimmer, and put the canoes in the water. The Mom/Dad and Sister/BIL/Baby C canoes all got on the water smoothly.

Then I got in our canoe and Dave tossed me into the water.

...okay, so it didn't quite happen that way, but it sure felt like it. Nip Dip #1

Most of the Nip is pretty pastoral. The stretch we were on runs thru Glacial Park, so it was quiet and uninhabited, for the most part. I can't remember how long we had been paddling, but we eventually came upon a little rapids section. S/BIL/Baby C broke left and made it through without incident.

We broke right. Nip Dip 2.

The canoe immediately got wedged between 2 rocks, turned sideways, and filled right up with water. We tipped over and my leg (which had been leisurely trailing in the water over the starboard side) got pinned between the rocks on the bottom, and the side of the canoe (which was now filled with water and sideways in the fairly quick rapids).

After a moment of potential broken ankle panic, I freed myself and we both were able to stand up. Yep, that's the beauty of the Mighty Nip. In most places, if you fall out of your boat, you can just stand up! (As Meg says, "You're okay! Just stand up!")

It was mid-calf deep, so we grabbed our mostly wet (from Nip Dip 1) stuff and the edge of the canoe and made for the shore. One step downstream, however, the water went from calf to hip deep. Another step and I was in up to my shoulder. It was pretty funny.

Aside from the coughing.

And the laughing of our 4 companions, including my parents, who had made it through unscathed, as well.

BIL Nick helped Dave extricate our canoe and we got back in.

I had chosen a 2 hour trip for us, but as it turned out, it was closer to 3.5. We lollygagged and, at times, waited for each other. Plus, Meg and Nick had to shift around to please Baby C.

Speaking of Baby C...she's such a great kid. Would your 11 month old happily wear a giant red life vest on a 3.5 hour canoe trip during which it was very sunny, but also rainy, and on top of that, get tossed in the water when her canoe hit a tree branch and sank? I think not.

Towards the end of the trip, we were all starting to get tired and it had also started to rain. Didn't matter to me, because if I had started to dry out from Dips 1 and 2, well, I had nothing to worry about...

The Nip gets very wind-ey and tree-filled as it goes thru Glacier Park. At one point, as we were negotiating some of the trees, I turned my head briefly to look at my adorable niece when WHACK! A tree branch to the side of the head took me right out of the port side of the canoe (and of course, Dave and everything else too). Nip Dip 3 and also the 3rd time we had to pick up the boat and pour the water out. (7 days later and I still have the lump on my head.)

Now, I can't remember if it happened before or after Nip Dip 3, and I wasn't there to see it in person, but apparently Meg and Nick also hit a tree and tipped the canoe--including Baby C--into the water. They say she cried, but I don't believe it, because when we came around the bend, Meg was standing in the water (You're okay! Just stand up!) holding the babe.

All wet, with her giant vest and her baby chick hair, but not crying! She's a trooper.

Like I told Meg, she would have made such a good pioneer baby. "Six weeks in a Conestoga wagon? Okay, as long as we've got sweet potato puffs.".

So, we eventually got to the end point and, since it was raining and we were tired, we whisked Baby C into the cars and went home.

There is nothing like a hot shower when you're cold and wet. And muddy. And sandy. With sticks in your hair. And rocks in your bathing suit**. And you're at your mom's house where you can use 3 squishy towels, but you don't have to wash them. And then she feeds you and makes you sleep on the couch. Ahhh.

:)


*1 point goes to the winner
**How does that work? I coulda made a sand castle with the grit I took home!

...oh, might've had something to do with the amount of time I spent underwater.

Dave.